Dylan Moran Quotes

You’re not really an adult at all. You’re just a tall child holding a beer, having a conversation you don’t understand.

Don't do it! Stay away from your potential. You'll mess it up, it's potential, leave it. Anyway, it's like your bank balance - you always have a lot less than you think.

Oh how I hate you. I hate you so much it gives me energy. I have to get up early in the morning just to hate you, because there's not enough time in the day! Please GO AWAY!

People will kill you over time, and how they'll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases, like 'be realistic.'

I don't do drugs. If I want a rush I just get out of a chair when I'm not expecting it.

Why do I even dare to think I could dream I could imagine I could hope?

Its not easy being a man you know. I had to get dressed today… and there are other pressures.

Nothing can make me feel better now, except cocaine."

You look like a horse in a man costume

Don't clap I'm not a jazz band for Christ's sake