Best Quotes by Milton Berle (Top 10)

  1. If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.
  2. If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?
  3. Laughter is an instant vacation.
  4. A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
  5. I'd rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. I'd rather be a has-been than a might-have-been, by far; for a might have-been has never been, but a has was once an are.
  6. Committee - a group of men who keep minutes and waste hours.
  7. We owe a lot to Thomas Edison - if it wasn't for him, we'd be watching television by candlelight.
  8. You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think.
  9. A young man fills out an application for a job and does well until he gets to the last question, "Who Should we notify in case of an accident?" He mulls it over and then writes, "Anybody in sight!"
  10. A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and asks, Did you miss a step? No, he answers, I hit every one of them!

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