Best Quotes by Spike Milligan (Top 10)

  1. Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
  2. Said Hamlet to Ophelia, I'll draw a sketch of thee. What kind of pencil shall I use? 2B or not 2B?
  3. All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
  4. I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
  5. I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
  6. My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
  7. On the Ning Nang Nong Where the Cows go Bong! And the Monkeys all say Boo! Theres a Nang Nong Ning Where the trees go Ping! And the tea pots Jibber Jabber Joo On the Nong Ning Nang All the Mice go Clang! And you just cant catch em when they do! So its Ning Nang Nong! Cows go Bong! Nong Nang Ning! Trees go Ping! Nong Ning Nang! The mice go Clang! What a noisy place to belong,Is the Ning Nang Ning Nang Nong!
  8. Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
  9. A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
  10. Money couldn't buy friends, but you got a better class of enemy.

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